~ Meg Bernard; Small Girl with Parkinson’s

Happy “tube-iversay” everyone!
November 28, 2015 marked the one year anniversary of the absence of all things swallowed; the insertion of my Jejunostomy feeding tube (it bypasses my stomach feeding directly into the second part of my small intestines). It feels like only weeks ago, yet also a lifetime ago.

**Sidebar** I have chosen not to mention; the green grape and red jujube that I, without thinking, popped into my mouth; as well as the 2 pieces of grape Bubblicious gum, which were accidentally swallowed. For, although it lead to the writing of highly amusing quips for my headstone should said incident bring about my demise; the winner being “she really blew it”; these incidents add so little to my reminiscence.

For your reading enjoyment/education, I will share this year’s top Q&A.

Q. Do you miss food?
A. No

Q. What are the BEST things about having a feeding tube?
A.
1. I can eat while I sleep.
2. I’m never accused of talking with my mouth full.
3. Consuming the same thing every day (Peptamen 1.5) makes meal planning easy.
4. My nieces and nephews think that it’s either; super cool, or, it freaks them out. Both of which I find highly entertaining.
5. I am an inexpensive dining companion.

Q. What are the most challenging things about having a feeding tube?
A.
1. The ‘social’ aspect of eating (I kinda stand out at dinner parties lol).
2. Regularly scheduled tube replacements (there is a ‘regular’ way for things to happen, and there is a ‘Meg’ way for things to happen; whole different ballgame)
3. Being attached to a ‘leash’ (aka my body being attached to a bag full of formula or water via tube) for up to 22 hours a day gets tedious YET also inspires creativity in all things ‘wardrobe’ related!!!

In trying to find the right words to tell you what this life changing thing has taught me and who it has helped me become, I found there were too many; therefore I leave you with this;

~366 days ago, I was ‘meg’.
~365 days ago I began the journey, the battle and the collecting of joy, which make me; the ‘work in progress’; woman you know today, ‘Meg’.

“It is in the fight for life, that I continue to discover my true value; and it was in the realization of my own insignificance, that I learned my true worth.” (~SGwPD)